Is she the one symbolized by a happy couple sitting on the couch and having fun

Is She the One? 10 Sure Signals It’s Time for the Next Step

by Eharmony Editorial Team - March 22, 2021

You’ve met someone, you’ve been dating a while, it’s going well… so well, in fact, that you’re beginning to wonder… is she the one? For many men, this is one of the hardest questions out there, even more so than asking her to marry you. You know you are in love, you know there’s physical and emotional attraction, you know you’re ready for a more serious relationship. The question is, is she interested? Here are ten signs to help you know if she’s the one.

1. She’s the first person you want to share things with

No matter whether it’s good news or bad, happy things or sad, the first person you want to tell is your girlfriend. Because you know she’ll be excited for your promotion or that cute puppy you saw on the way home, or be ready with hugs and commiseration when you tell her about your bad day.

2. When you think of the future, you think of her

We all have daydreams about the people we’re serious about. You’ll know if she is the one when your daydreams about her and things like… what your kids will look like, if you’ll be as in love as that old couple you see at the park, or if your future plans are more on the lines of ‘buy a house together’ than ‘go to that new Italian restaurant at some point.’

3. You two have your own secret language

All it takes for her to crack up is for you to send her a dinosaur emoji. Or you and her can have an hours-long conversation just with GIFs. Or you have so many in-jokes it would take a book to list them all. Your shared secret language is a definite sign that she is the one.

4. She makes you feel safe enough to be vulnerable

One of the hardest things for anyone to do, is to be vulnerable. Which is why, if you feel safe letting your girlfriend see that side of you, it’s a pretty good indication that she’s the one. One of the most important qualities in any relationship is trust, and you’ll know you are in love with someone when you can trust her completely.

5. Little things remind you of her

She’s always on your mind… in a good way. You head to Target for something, and the sight of that awful boxed wine she likes makes you smile. You’re watching TV, and an ad comes on that reminds you of her. You’re out with your friends, and you bring her up in every conversation. She’s a major part of your everyday life and you wouldn’t have it any other way.

6. You apologize even when you’re not wrong

The hardest words in the English language? “I’m sorry.” But if she is the one, you’re willing to say them even when it’s not your fault, like during those little arguments that blow up into big ones, or during silly fights that have you fuming at each other. It’s those moments when you know that she’s more important than digging your heels in that prove your love. Plus, when you can apologize like that, you know you’re ready to for a more serious relationship.

7. You care about the things she does… and she does the same for you

Honestly, you couldn’t care less about reality TV, or astrology, or even makeup, but that doesn’t matter – they’re important to your girlfriend, so you listen when she talks, about them and make sure you know enough to offer intelligent commentary, because your girl does the same when you talk about the things that are important to you.

8. You Talk. Really Talk

One of the surest signs that she is the one is an attraction that’s emotional, not just physical. When you can talk to your girlfriend about anything, from your favorite movies to what you like (and don’t like) in the bedroom to any problems you might be having, in the relationship or out of it, then you know this is a love made to last.

9. You Can Be Yourself Around Her

This right here is the biggest hint that yes, she really is the one – when you can be yourself around her. When you don’t have to put on a mask to shield her from the reality of your existence, and you can be your fun, silly, authentic self, but also your sad or angry or depressed self, and she not only accepts it, but loves you more for it.

10. But You’re Willing to Change for The Better

While you should never change just to match up to other people’s expectations of you, a good sign that she is the one is that she makes you want to be better, not just for her, but for you. Being willing to grow and change together is the hallmark of a great relationship.

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She’s the One If You Don’t Even Have to Think about It

Moving between dating stages – especially a jump like this one, from exclusive dating to something more, can be really scary, especially since it’s such a big decision. But if your relationship with your girlfriend matches the points on this list? That’s a pretty good signals she is, indeed, the one… and you might just want to make sure she knows it.

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