Choosing To Be Choosy When Online Dating

Faced with the daunting task of weeding through online dating profiles? You’re not alone. There are so many options to choose from that it can feel overwhelming. You don’t want to waste your time, but more importantly you don’t want to pick someone who’s just going to play with your heart and leave you by the side of the road. This is why it’s important that you choose to be choosy when online dating. I’ll show you how.

  1. Have a Stellar Profile.There is no substitute for a good profile that clearly and concisely indicates who you are as well as your dealmakers and dealbreakers. A good profile shows you’re serious about meeting someone who is looking for the same things as you.
  2. Widen Your Horizons. Make sure you’ve got all your bases covered by widening your horizons. This means extend your search zones a little bit as well as your preferences. Opening it up just that little bit more will give you more options.
  3. Do the Right Search.Make sure that when you use the search function you fill it out completely, especially if you are looking for a specific type of person. Sometimes it’s good to be a little open with your options, but take into account your dealmakers and dealbreakers.
  4. A Picture Speaks a Thousand Words.Make sure that they have what looks to be a recent picture that matches their profile description (do they look their age? their weight?). If all their pictures are mirror selfies, group pictures, unclear photos or glamour shots just move on to another profile. They aren’t being authentic. A good profile will have around 3-4 pictures maximum and they will tell you a story about who they are.
  5. What’s Their Slogan/Tag Line?Their tag line should draw people in and make them want to learn more. What does their tag line tell you? Is it positive or negative? Is it funny? Is it weird? Tag lines like “here I go again” or “boring people need not apply” tell you that this person has major baggage so avoid them.
  6. Read Their Profile. In order to determine whether or not this person is right for you, you need to read through and see where they’re at in their life. You can tell a lot by what people say (or don’t say). If they don’t have a write-up then move on. Any negativity and do’s and don’ts in the profile are major red flags because it shows they have baggage.
  7. Making First Contact.  Short, generic messages like “hi” just don’t cut it, neither do canned messages that seem copy and pasted. They need to introduce themselves and mention something relevant from your profile and maybe why they think you’re compatible.
  8. Pay Attention to Communications. Do you get one word answers? Then chances are they aren’t really that interested. Ask questions that will help you know them and their intentions better. Do they want more pics rather than wanting to really get to know you in a real way? Move on.
  9. Gut Instincts.Always listen to your gut no matter what. Even if they are telling you everything you want to hear, if something feels off or not quite right you’re probably right. So don’t waste your time or ignore your instincts.
  10. Take It Offline.When you connect with someone in a positive way online then you need to meet offline as soon as possible. Within a couple weeks you should have planned a date. If they keep making excuses and cancelling it’s a red flag. You’re not looking for a textationship, you’re looking for a potential partner. No point in giving too much time to a time waster.

Choosing to be choosy when online dating will ensure you have a better experience and eventually you may even end up with your happily ever after!

Have a dating dilemma? You can always Ask Single Dating Diva a confidential dating question or request her FREE eBook on

Suzie is the founder of, an award winning blog about being single, dating and relationships. The blog showcases the many adventures we have and how challenging, but also exciting dating really is because single isn’t a bad word and dating really can be fun!! With experience comes wisdom and she also shares some lessons learned along the way helping others through her consulting services. She also co-hosts the SexLoveChat Podcast and Twitter chat discussing current topics about sex and love. You can also find Suzie as a guest expert on various television and radio programs.