Social media plays a big role in your dating life and it can have both positive and negative effects. So how do you navigate the dating waters online? Very carefully! Social media could give singles a false sense of security when online dating. Why? Well, people display what they want others to see online. What they display and what is reality are not always the same. While there’s no need to be paranoid, you need to date smart.
Be mindful of what you put on social media.
- Make sure you only put personal information behind privacy so that only your friends can see it. Things such as pictures of where you live, information about where you work, your friend lists should all be reserved for your friends only.
- Your relationship status shouldn’t be public.
- Anyone who sees your comments or likes or whatever online can click on your profile and go through it. Make sure they can’t see what you don’t want them to.
Social media connects you with others.
- Singles use it to “fact check” people they’ve met online before they meet in person.
- If you’re going to use social media with other singles you’ve met make sure to respect people’s privacy.
- Don’t add someone you’re dating on social media unless you’ve gone on several dates. This makes it less awkward if things don’t work out in the early stages AND it helps your dating life because it leaves something to the imagination and stuff to talk about on dates.
Creeping on your dates usually isn’t a good idea.
- Ask anyone if they creep on their dates online before meeting in person (or after) and most will say yes. Some use it to verify information shared or some to just be nosy.
- Adding someone on social media too early on can be risky dating behavior, their activity online will leave you wondering and many times insecure and paranoid. So unless you know where you stand with them don’t add them or research them. Besides, it’s never the whole story.
If you have ended things with someone, end it on social media as well.
- Ending a relationship should be an end on social media but most people don’t. They want to keep up with what the person is doing. Unless you share a child or something important, it’s usually best to delete them. You should let it go and move on, there is no need to make yourself suffer more than you already are. You can’t move forward if you keep looking back.
Social media should enhance your interactions when dating, not replace them.
- Social media is a great way of connecting with people if used in the right way.
- It shouldn’t be used as a “research” tool or a way to keep tabs on someone.
- Always prioritize face to face interactions in order to avoid textationships.
Social media puts you at risk of “catfishing”.
- Catfishing is gaining someone’s trust and admiration before asking for money. These people approach lonely women and men (usually who have “single” as their public relationship status), telling them what they want to hear, making them feel loved, wanted and special and then once they’ve gained their trust give a sob story and ask for money. Some red flags that someone is a catfish:
- They randomly add you on social media
- They ask you for your personal information
- They are “too good to be true” good looking, smart AND you can’t believe your luck because they want YOU
- They have a sob story
- They don’t actually want to meet you in person, they don’t even try, or, they live in another country.
- Catfishing is fraudulent behavior and people have been scammed out of thousands of dollars so be smart! Be careful who you add on social media and don’t put your public relationship status as single. If you think you’ve been catfished or suspect someone you’re chatting with you should contact your local police.
Social media plays a big role in your dating life and can be a positive tool to enhance your interactions if you use it right. You just need to use it wisely and not get caught up in risky behavior. Also, avoid using it to be nosy about those you are dating because it might not get the entire story and you run the risk of jumping to the wrong conclusions. So enjoy your dating life, leave some stuff to the imagination and enjoy the process of getting to know someone because slow and steady ALWAYS wins the race!
Your Sister in Dating Bliss,
Single Dating Diva
Have a dating dilemma? You can always Ask Single Dating Diva a confidential dating question on http://singledatingdiva.com.
Suzie is the founder of SingleDatingDiva.com, an award winning blog about being single, dating and relationships. The blog showcases the many adventures we have and how challenging, but also exciting dating really is because single isn’t a bad word and dating really can be fun!! With experience comes wisdom and she also shares some lessons learned along the way helping others through her consulting services. She also co-hosts the SexLoveChat Podcast and Twitter chat discussing current topics about sex and love. You can also find Suzie as a guest expert on various television and radio programs.